by Chris Owen

Even if you’ve never been on a cruise, chances are, you have heard stories about never-ending buffets, complimentary, 24-hour room-service and all kinds of gaudy bells and whistles. The common misconception among “non-cruisers” is that the culinary experience is reminiscent of an 80’s Vegas-buffet. The problem with this visual is that unless you happen to really love Elvis impersonators and scrambled eggs that are rapidly drying-out under heat-lamps, it doesn’t make onboard dining seem all that appealing. (Cue super-hero music) But that’s where I come in!

 In this series, I will give you frank, up-to-date information about what you will and won’t find on modern cruise vacations. I’ll start by addressing some general misconceptions about cruising, and of course, move on to discuss the “all-important” dining situation, which indeed has a significant influence on your level of satisfaction with your vacation.

The Rocking and Rolling of the Ship

One of the biggest worries I had before my first cruise had to do with the motion of the ship on the water.  I thought it would be rocking and rolling like the Mayflower, causing hoards of people to lose their lunch…and dinner…and breakfast…

Not so.

Cruise ships are like moving islands with giant stabilizer arms that are designed to minimize the “motion in the ocean” you are bound to feel. These arms extend from the hull of the ship, much like wings on an airplane.  If Christopher Columbus had a set of these babies, he’d have touched base in America and swung right on down to the Caribbean for sure.

Will I get sick?

Not likely. 

If you occasionally got car-sick as a child, the rocking and rolling of the ship will probably not have a serious effect on you. However, if you find that your sensitivity to motion is such that you have to close your eyes during some movie scenes because the action depicted makes you ill, this can be a deal-breaker. Fortunately, there are some precautions you can take.

The fact is, you will feel some movement—you are on a boat after all.  This feeling should pass as you become accustomed to it and get your “sea legs”. On the flip-side, don’t panic if your sea legs don’t disappear right away. The condition usually lasts for a short time after you return to dry-land as your body adjusts to its stagnant surroundings once more.  I personally think it might be a dirty trick the cruise lines play to get you to think about booking your next cruise as soon as you get home…

If you are prone to motion sickness, the best advice I can give you is to avoid it in the first place.  Once “sea-sickness” sets in, it’s too late.  You’ll have to take a trip to the ship’s medical center, get a shot, and spend the next 24 to 48 hours in misery getting over it.   An over-the-counter medication called “Bonine” does the trick for just about everyone.  If you have questions about it, give your doctor or pharmacist a call!  I have heard that if you begin taking it the day before sailing and then once a day throughout the course of your trip, it is highly successful in eliminating potential problems.

Just a bunch of old-timers?

In a word—NO.

That may very well have been the case in the early 1970s, but Carnival, always at the top of its game, recognized the deterioration of the industry and responded with a fleet of “Fun Ships” that forever changed the nature of cruise vacations.  They turned a sleepy crawl across the Atlantic or around the Caribbean into an action-packed getaway that allowed travelers to leave all their cares behind and truly unwind. Other cruise lines got on board with Carnival’s new concept of cruising and revamped their own offerings.

Older people often do enjoy the variety of amenities that a cruise offers, but so do families, couples, singles, and groups. The point is, cruises offer such an impressive assortment of activities, that people of all ages, ethnicities, and lifestyles can spend their vacations doing (or not doing) whatever they please.

“A cruise is all-inclusive”

Nothing is “all-inclusive” these days. While your onboard activities, entertainment, and even standard-fare meals are generally covered on a cruise, there are plenty of opportunities to spend more.  Soft-drinks, and cocktails add-up quickly! Throw a spa treatment, shore excursion, some casino action, and a souvenir or five, into the mix and you can be well on your way to paying as much for the extras as you did for the whole cruise package. Consider yourself forewarned.

Nevertheless, it’s still a great value if you restrict your little splurges.  I recently compared an average cruise with an average stay in Vegas and the ship came out way ahead financially.  I might be a tad biased though.

How big is the pool?

You will NOT be swimming laps here. 

Though there are usually several pools and whirlpools onboard—maybe even a huge water slide or attraction, they are not “swimming” pools.  They are more like “gathering and games” pools.  They also tend to be centrally located so they get crowded. Another interesting quirk is that many of them contain filtered sea-water. This is good to know before you take a plunge with your mouth open. In short, I suggest that you save the real swimming for home or one of your excursions to the shore.

So what about the food then?

For those of you who were really looking forward to that 80s Vegas-style buffet, the likelihood of you being able to fulfill your “all-you-can-eat” dreams is very high. Most ships have at least one buffet. Depending on the cruise line though, you may find that your dining choices are much more extensive.

Most recently, I was on the Norwegian Epic, a new ship that features “Freestyle Dining.” In addition to a main dining room and buffet that are available during certain hours, Epic hosts a variety of trendy dining venues.  Cirque Dreams and Dinner is a night-time dining experience with a prix-fixe menu that revolves around a Cirque du Soleil-style show.  As I recall, a tapas bar, a steak house, and a home-style restaurant were just a few of the other restaurants present on the Epic.

Celebrity Cruises adds flavor to an already robust onboard experience with special interest cruises. Some of these cruises are geared to those with an appreciation for fine food and wine. Celebrity Cruises arranges for a renowned chef or wine-maker to design menus and lead participants through wonderful eating and drinking experiences. Can you think of a better way to unwind after a busy day of ship activities or excursions than with a truly great meal? Neither can I.

We have only just scratched the surface of the cruise-experience, but I can assure you that by the end of this series, you will have all the information you need to decide whether or not a cruise is in your future vacation plans.   Along the way when you have questions, please don’t hesitate to write me.   As a travel writer, blogger and agent, answering questions is what I do.  See my blog at ChrisCruises.net for more and email me with your specific questions about cruise vacations

About Chris Owen

Chris Owen is a travel writer, blogger and agent from Orlando Florida charged with sharing frank, inside information on cruise vacations with travelers.  A graduate of Washburn University in Topeka Kansas, Chris moved to Florida after successful careers in the restaurant and newspaper business to focus singly on travel with a concentration on cruise vacations.  Certified a Master Cruise Counselor by the Cruise Lines International Association, Chris can be found via his popular cruise vacations column on Examiner.com, through his blog, ChrisCruises.net and on his long-running cruise information website, YourCruiseDream.com. 

Email Chris: Chris@YourCruiseDream.com